I posted this on Facebook when it happened, but it seemed like the perfect way to begin. I'm not always this witty but I can hope! I first had the controls of a plane a great many years ago but I ended up waiting my whole life to actually learn to fly.
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Flying, at long last…
Lesson 1.
93+ degrees, 2PM, sun high enough to not be a distraction, clear sky,
visibility mildly hazy many miles away (all the mountains are a little soft)
Do checklist. Watch for stuck bugs. Bugs could be your downfall.
Instructor: Just tap the rudder, you
don’t need to push too much or you’ll overcompensate. Just keep to the center line. Remember,
control with your feet. Go up to the hold line. Watch for coyotes.
What your brain is doing: Coyotes??? Hey
this is great, just push the pedal a litt…WAAAH-T-F Why am I all over the
taxiway???Steering! WOOPSNOPE. FEET!feetfeettoesbrakes. BRAAAAAKKKEEEESSS!
Radio: Cleared for takeoff.
Brain: Great, the fun begins. Center line. C’mon speed 😊 WAIT Where IS my center line I can’t see over
the dash OH IM IN THE AIR WOOHOO ohay this is kewl. Zoom zoom zoom look around
watch the plane ahead of me. I can do this.
AAAAAHHHHHH WAS THAT TURBULENCE?!!!!! I am a leaf on the wind. Leaf. Maybe
this wasn’t such a good idea (as the wings tip of their own accord & I yank
them back, overcompensating, still climbing, bounce a bit, bouncybouncyTHISISSCARY
stomach flipflops, carnival ride for a second. Is this roll or yaw? OMG this is
a clear day what if there was actual weather???
(Focus. Instructor voice coming
over the headset breaking the thought. Poof no more leaf on wind)
Instructor: On a clear day you get
some crosswinds here. Little bumpy. Just
go straight & level at 2500 feet.
Can you see ____? (points out landmarks while I’m staring straight ahead
& trying not to obsess on the altimeter).
Brain: Building? You want me to look DOWN at a THING??? What
if I look down & the nose goes down??? Can I look out sideways? Is there a
plane behind us? Where’s my level-y gauge with the plane in it? I’m level.
I’m at 2500. Good. I’m not
looking down. Nonononono. Maybe I’ll
just keep pulling back & getting higher.
WOOPS needle too close to red line get the nose down. NOT TOO FAST.
Breathe. Level. Straight. OK I can do
this. Aim at Mt Hood. Good. Mountain=stable.
Hello Mountain. Gauges. Level. Good. When do I lean? WHICHPULL-THINGYISTHELEAN?
Level. Good.
Instructor: OK we’re getting a little
close to PDX airspace so go to the left. (Tunes radio to PDX tower, points out
another landmark, chatters about what the landmarks are in the pattern, where
the turns are).
Brain: PDX??????? I don’t see any big
planes. Where are they? I know they’re up here.
Maybe I should have picked the low wing plane. Can they see me? Oh I hope they’re way up
high I can’t see themWHYCAN’TISEETHEM???? WHO POSTED THAT YOUTUBE YESTERDAY OF
THE WING COMING OFF I HATE YOU. Sideways feels wrong. [All the while pulling
the nose up & watching the turn bubble & executing a decent turn]
Breathe. Turn some more. Still feels wrong. Ah level again. This is nice. Oh look. It’s pretty out there. The Willamette is right under me. It
sparkles. Fly down the valley. It does
look like a valley from up here. A long
soft V. No fires in this direction. Checkerboards of green & tan
farms. Full sun, all the colors are
intense. Dense green trees wherever there’s water. Coast range a dark shadow far away. Is the snow Mt Adams? Jefferson? Relax. Level. Nudgenudgecontrols. OK this is great, as long as no other planes
around this is great. This is pretty. I can relax. WHEREISTHEFUELGAUGE?
Instructor: See that strip about 6
miles out? That’s McMinnville, that’s the next turn in the training area. (points out St. Paul, mountains, other
landmarks, talks about what we hear on the radio, I think I hear my coworker
calling the tower, must remember to see if he was in the air same time as me)
Go lower, there are some other planes in the Hillsboro pattern, let’s stay out
of their way. You ok?
Brain: I don’t like lower. Too close
to ground. 1500’. Everything looks too close. Must go back up. Up. Upupupupup. Lower feels
like falling out of the sky. Breathe.
Level. Brain not yelling this time. Time to turn again. Up? Can we go up?
Please? Up? Why is this scary I DID IT WHEN I WAS 14 WHY IS IT SCARY?! Up. YAY!
Happy again.
Plane under us. Swoopy clearing turns.
Where’d he go? Oh we’re outa time must head back. More landmarks. Last turn.
See the drag strip? OK. turns are OK. I got this turn thing figured out.
Slow down. Line up to runway. Runway. Center line. Here it comes. Hand over controls. We’re down before I can think about it, landing
happens way faster than I expected. All done. Taxi back & put the plane
away. Fill out the logbook. WOOHOO I
HAVE A LINE IN MY LOGBOOK! And my headset was great. Scared witless a few times but I WILL DO THIS
THING. I do not like the scared part one bit.
